Yom Kippur Day 2025 / We Are Never Alone (10/02/25)

We Are Never Alone

The rabbis sought to make Judaism a full-body, full-life experience. So that no matter what we do, we can connect with God and our heritage.

And I mean, no matter what we do, even going to the bathroom!

Now, you have to remember that bathrooms in ancient days were the equivalent of porta-potties or outhouses.

The Talmud (Brachot 60b) says,

הַנִּכְנָס לְבֵית הַכִּסֵּא, אוֹמֵר: ״הִתְכַּבְּדוּ מְכוּבָּדִים קְדוֹשִׁים מְשָׁרְתֵי עֶלְיוֹן, תְּנוּ כָּבוֹד לֵאלֹהֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל, הַרְפּוּ מִמֶּנִּי עַד שֶׁאֶכָּנֵס וְאֶעֱשֶׂה רְצוֹנִי וְאָבֹא אֲלֵיכֶם״. אָמַר אַבָּיֵי: לָא לֵימָא אִינָשׁ הָכִי, דִּלְמָא שָׁבְקִי לֵיהּ וְאָזְלִי. אֶלָּא לֵימָא: ״שִׁמְרוּנִי שִׁמְרוּנִי, עִזְרוּנִי עִזְרוּנִי, סִמְכוּנִי סִמְכוּנִי, הַמְתִּינוּ לִי הַמְתִּינוּ לִי עַד שֶׁאֶכָּנֵס וְאֵצֵא, שֶׁכֵּן דַּרְכָּן שֶׁל בְּנֵי אָדָם״.

One who enters a bathroom says to the angels, the spirit guides who accompany him at all times: “Oh, honorable holy ones, servants of the One on High, give honor to the God of Israel and leave me until I enter and take care of my needs, and come back to you.”

Abaye, another Talmudic Sage, disagrees; he says: A person should not say this, lest they abandon him. Rather, he should say: “Guard me, guard me, help me, help me, support me, support me. Wait for me, wait for me until I come out, as this is the way of human beings.”

Now, you may never have said this prayer before going to the bathroom, because it fell out of style.

Rabbi Yechiel Michel Epstein explains (Aruch HaShulchan 3):

Now, we no longer have the custom to say this petition. This was the tradition of the earlier generations whose thoughts were always devoted to G-d. They felt the holiness of those who escorted them (the angels); therefore, it was natural for them to say so.

In modern times, we also have the escort of angels or spirit guides, as the sages of blessed memory have explained; however, we don’t notice their presence at all. Therefore, our saying this to them would be considered arrogant and egotistical. Indeed, holy people who are involved with Torah in holiness need to say this, but we ordinary people do not. This is the practice.

On the other hand, on Shabbat, after we’ve placed the challah on the table, we’ve dressed in our elegant Shabbos garments and have lit the candles, we actually do welcome our special Shabbat angels to our homes and congregations through the song Shalom Aleichem, but during the weekday, when we’re caught up in the bustle of our activity, we’ve stopped speaking to them.

Rabbi Epstein notes that some rabbis disagree with the current practice, and when we go to the bathroom, we should say, “Hey, wait for me, Angels.”

I agree with those dissenters.

Let’s keep this entertaining idea on hold for a little while.

One of the most dramatic and mysterious parts of today’s service is when the Chazzan enters the “Avodah” section of the prayers. Reenacting the roles of the High Priest, the Cantor, and in many places, the whole congregation falls on their face in prostration, mimicking what was done in the Temple in Jerusalem upon hearing G-d’s name.

Only once a year, on Yom Kippur, was the name Yud/Hay/Vav/Hey pronounced as it’s written.

Nowadays, we don’t pronounce the name and stick with the replacement, Ado-nai, which means my Master or Lord.

The rabbis say that over time, we’ve forgotten how to pronounce it, but I think that’s just a ruse. The rabbis understood that giving a name creates definition. There’s a limitation in a name. If I’m Neil, then I’m not Frank and Robert, as well. But God doesn’t have these limitations.

Traditionally, the understanding of Yud/Hay/Vuv/Hey is that it represents a name of eternality; God was היה, is הוה, and will be יהיה.

Dr. Shlomo Dov Goitein (1900-1985), a scholar of both Jewish and Arabic studies, questions this interpretation, though.

He asks, Where did Moses first encounter G-d? On Mt. Sinai.

Well, where’s Mount Sinai?

Somewhere close to ancient Midian.

After fleeing Egypt for killing a taskmaster, Moses ends up by a well in Midian. There, he rescues the daughters of the High Priest from shepherds who were bullying them. Once introduced to the High Priest, Jethro, Moses marries his daughter, Tzipporah.

While shepherding Jethro’s sheep, Moses spies the burning bush.

After an engaging conversation, in which God asks Moses to free His people from Egypt. Moses asks God, What’s Your name, God ultimately replies:

ספר שמות פרק ג

טו) וַיֹּאמֶר עוֹד אֱלֹהִים אֶל משֶׁה כֹּה תֹאמַר אֶל בְּנֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל יְדֹוָד אֱלֹהֵי אֲבֹתֵיכֶם אֱלֹהֵי אַבְרָהָם אֱלֹהֵי יִצְחָק וֵאלֹהֵי יַעֲקֹב שְׁלָחַנִי אֲלֵיכֶם זֶה שְּׁמִי לְעֹלָם וְזֶה זִכְרִי לְדֹר דֹּר

Thus shall you say to the Children of Israel: YHWH, the God of your fathers,

the God of Avraham, the God of Yitzhak, and the God of Yaakov,

has sent me to you. This is my name for the ages, this is my title from generation to generation.

So, we’re introduced to the name, Yud/Hay/Vuv/Hay, but there’s no explanation in the Torah of the meaning or significance of this name.

The ancient Egyptians actually have records of the name of this G-d. In fact, we have two ancient Egyptian inscriptions that refer to the “Shasu of yhwh.” (Egyptian yhw3).^[1] The Shasu lived near Midian and Edom.

In fact, the Bible itself records Yud/Hay/Vav/Hey coming the Midian/Edom area.

Every year, on Simchat Torah, when we read Zot HaBracha, we chant (Deut 33:2)

יְ־הוָה מִסִּינַי בָּא וְזָרַח מִשֵּׂעִיר לָמוֹ הוֹפִיעַ מֵהַר פָּארָן וְאָתָה מֵרִבְבֹת קֹדֶשׁ…

YHWH came from Sinai; He shone upon them from Seir; He appeared from Mount Paran, and approached from Ribeboth-kodesh…

The prophetess, Devorah, also sang:

יְ־הוָה בְּצֵאתְךָ מִשֵּׂעִיר בְּצַעְדְּךָ מִשְּׂדֵה אֱדוֹם אֶרֶץ רָעָשָׁה… YHWH, when You came forth from Seir, advanced from the country of Edom, the earth trembled…

Historically, the Midianites were an Arab tribe. If so, the name Yud/Hay/Vav/Hay would have its origins in the proto-Arabic language.

However, in Proto-Arabic, the roots ה.ו.י do equate to the verb to be. Rather, Goitein suggested that the name derives from the Arabic root h.w.y (هوى), and the word hawaya (هوايا), which means “love, affection, passion, desire.”^[2]

This would mean that this monotheistic Entity, Yud/Hey/Vuv/Hey, is all about love.

In truth, this is recognizable in the Torah. Love is mentioned nineteen times in the book of Deuteronomy, and it’s always associated with the name YHVH.

ספר דברים פרק י

יב) וְעַתָּה יִשְׂרָאֵל מָה יְדֹוָד אֱלֹהֶיךָ שֹׁאֵל מֵעִמָּךְ כִּי אִם לְיִרְאָה אֶת יְדֹוָד אֱלֹהֶיךָ לָלֶכֶת בְּכָל דְּרָכָיו וּלְאַהֲבָה אֹתוֹ וְלַעֲבֹד אֶת יְדֹוָד אֱלֹהֶיךָ בְּכָל לְבָבְךָ וּבְכָל נַפְשֶׁךָ:

“And now, O Israel, what does your God יהוה demand of you? Only this: to revere your God יהוה, to walk only in divine paths, to love and to serve your God יהוה with all your heart and soul.”

In the Sh’ma we have:

ספר דברים פרק יא

יג) וְהָיָה אִם שָׁמֹעַ תִּשְׁמְעוּ אֶל מִצְוֹתַי אֲשֶׁר אָנֹכִי מְצַוֶּה אֶתְכֶם הַיּוֹם לְאַהֲבָה אֶת יְדֹוָד אֱלֹהֵיכֶם וּלְעָבְדוֹ בְּכָל לְבַבְכֶם וּבְכָל נַפְשְׁכֶם

“If, then, you obey the commandments that I enjoin upon you this day, to love your God יהוה and serve God with all your heart and soul…”

So, this name is indeed correlated with love. Most of the time, we are the ones urged to love God, but occasionally, Moses mentions that God loves us too. But, as we clearly see from Parshat Ki Tavo and Bechokotai, the love is conditional. If we’re loyal to God and the Torah, we’ll receive blessings; if not, God will hide from us, and we’ll be cursed.

What if the author of Deuteronomy got it only partially right? That God is love, but this love is indeed unconditional?

I suspect that at that time, humanity was not ready to accept God’s unconditional love. As I mentioned last night, three thousand years ago, humankind was running on the paradigm of power and fear: might makes right. Therefore, God demands absolute fealty.

While they could accept that God is loving, there had to be limitations on that love.

However, since the time of the Ba’al Shem Tov in the mid-18th Century, nearly all the branches of Judaism have emphasized G-d’s unconditional love, and this is also clearly expressed in modern spiritual teachings.

About 12 years ago, I read a book that made me question my beliefs. Back then, reports of NDEs- Near Death Experiences- were common, but most were very short stories.

The person gets into an accident or becomes deathly ill, they have an out-of-body experience or are drawn to a Tunnel of light. They meet a spiritual being, and they’re told it’s not their time. Each case is different, of course, but if you read the book “Life After Life” by Dr. Raymond Moody, most people’s tales barely make it to two pages.

On the other hand, when neuroscientist Dr. Eben Alexander suffers cerebral meningitis and enters a coma, he’s basically brain-dead for two weeks.

When he comes to, he’s had such vast and vivid experiences that he’s able to write a compelling two-hundred-page book.

In “Proof of Heaven”, Alexander recounts that at one point, he (his soul) enters a very exalted heavenly realm. Alexander calls this place the Core. Here, G-d communicated to him that “You are loved and cherished.” And that, “You have nothing to fear.”

Furthermore, Alexander came to understand that:

“Love is, without a doubt, the basis of everything. Not some abstract, hard to fathom, kind of love, but the day-to-day kind that everyone knows-the kind of love we feel when we look at our spouse and our children, or even our animals. In its purest and most powerful form, this love is not jealous or selfish, but unconditional. This is the reality of realities, the incomprehensibly glorious truth of truths that lives and breathes at the core of everything that exists or that ever will exist, and no remotely accurate understanding of who and what we are can be achieved by anyone who does not know it, and embody it in all of their actions.”^[3]

Last year, I read to you an inspired Meditation by Orin and DaBen. Perhaps now, it will make more sense:

As I breathe in,

I breathe in love.

I draw in love

from everywhere in the universe.

Love flows in through my breath.

Love flows into every part of my body

carried on my breath.

I open to receive love.

If God is love, then love, too, is everywhere, and we can draw upon it at all times.

Since Dr. Raymond Moody gave legitimacy to near-death experiences in the mid 70’s, people have become more open about sharing their experiences. There’s a website called the Near Death Experience Research Foundation, where 5300 people have posted their stories for all to read.

I’d like to share a post from one woman with you.

Tasha was experiencing PTSD, depression, and anxiety, and when she started to feel chest pains, she decided to just let go.

After seeing herself rise above her body, she records:

“The next thing I knew, I felt as if I were being pulled out of reality itself. It was as if I was traveling through a dark tunnel in outer space. Specks of light and streams of iridescent colors flew past and through me.

It felt like I blinked, and when I opened them again, I found myself in a new space. This place wasn’t defined by walls, a floor, a ceiling, windows, or any physical objects. I can only describe it as being engulfed by the brightest and most vivid white light—brighter than anyone could imagine. It was completely devoid of anything physical; it was just pure light.

This space radiated what I can only describe as bliss, happiness, joy, euphoria, and above all, unconditional love and acceptance.

It was at that moment that I sensed a presence, and I noticed multiple iridescent light figures or outlines appearing all around me. They resembled beings of light, like me, but with more vivid and brighter colors.

I experienced a form of telepathic communication that filled me with reassurance and peace.

Next, I saw what appeared to be doors materializing around me in a circle. One of the light beings guided me to open each door one by one. Each door transported me to a different memory of the traumatic events I had experienced and survived in my life.

It was as if I was being shown each event from a new perspective.

As every memory played back, I noticed multiple iridescent lights weaving through the air around me. It became clear that even though I had often felt alone and unprotected throughout my life, I had never been alone; I was always surrounded and protected by these light beings.

This experience led me to the realization that I do matter and that I am loved and cared for.”^[4]

Now, let’s return to Rabbi Epstein’s explanation of why we don’t speak to our spirit guides. “In modern times, we also have the escort of angels or spirit guides, as the sages of blessed memory have explained; however, we don’t notice their presence at all.”

We’re like Tasha, we all have spirit guides who love us and try to lead us on the right path, but we don’t recognize them.

She writes, “I came to understand that these beings were the source of my intuition—the still, small voice in my head that I hadn’t always listened to.”

We all have these angels in our lives because God loves us and wants us all to achieve our fullest potential. Our guides lay plans before us or drop ideas in our heads. We should listen next time.

All of this is because God, whether indicated by the name Yud/Hey/Vav/Hey or not, is rooted in unconditional love.

So as we begin the year anew, you don’t need to ask your guides to wait outside the bathroom for you, but you can ask them for help, guidance, and insight. They’re sent from a loving God to help us.

Speaking about angels sent to help us, we are about to begin the Yizkor service. And no doubt, many of our departed loved ones were specifically chosen to help us be our best selves.

Yizkor is an opportunity to remember those people in our lives who are no longer with us.

To dwell for a few moments on the lives that they lived.

To remember the lessons that they taught us, by word or

by deed.

To reflect on how much we miss them.

To thank God that they were part of our lives.

We all have angels in our lives, some of them are or were human, and some of them are actually angelic.

Because God’s essence is love, we have all these beings in our lives in order to bring out the best in us.

Remember, we are never alone, and we are always loved unconditionally.

Shana Tova

^[1] Friedman, Richard Elliott. The Exodus (p. 122). HarperCollins. Kindle Edition.no real explanation in the Torah of what the name means.

^[2] Shelomo Dov Goitein, “YHWH the Passionate: The Monotheistic Meaning and Origin of the Name YHWH,” Vetus Testamentum 6.1 (1956): 1-9.

^[3] Eben Alexander, Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife (New York: Simon & Schuster, 2012), 71.

^[4] https://www.nderf.org/Experiences/1tasha_l_nde.html